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Mouth-Breathers Already Mad At Rainbow Doritos

Words by: Luke Hickey

Image Credit: Konbini

This week, Doritos announced a new partnership with the It Gets Better Project, a non-profit organisation spearheaded by Dan Savage to combat the alarmingly-high rate of mental issues and suicide amongst LGBT people. For a limited time, those who donate $10 or more to the Project will receive a special rainbow edition of the iconic salsa chips in recognition of the organisation’s five year anniversary. And of course that means Doritos are trying to make us all into fags.

It Gets Better serves as a highly visible and vocal platform for many queer people to share their stories and struggles with others to let them know that life does indeed, get better. But because we can’t have nice things, conservative pundits with no full-time job (I’m assuming that’s how they afford the luxury of perpetual, blind hatred) are already shitting on the idea, with one particular brain trust calling it “the perfect gateway snack to introduce children to the joys of homosexuality”. 

Even with that helluva Freudian slip, the rest of Twitter is still following suit with the #boycottdoritos hashtag campaign to stamp out this godless endeavour of reducing youth suicide. If you want an idea of what it looks like to be a 40-year old man who still has the comebacks of a primary-schooler, I suggest giving it a look. One guy suggests this is just the beginning of a full-blown Queer takeover, and it’s only a matter of time until the Dorito bags come with toy dildos.

Actually, you know what…. Nah… That probably wouldn’t be appropriate.