Entire Third of Planet Can’t See Milky Way Thanks to Light Pollution

Words by: Smoko Henderson

Everybody already knew that Australia had better bush doofs, but in case you needed another good reason: Singapore, over half of Europe, and the entire east coast of the USA are now so affected by light pollution that you can not see the Milky Way in the night sky.

Qatar, Israel and the Netherlands are experiencing the same loss of vision.

The findings were part of a recent international study conducted by distinguished women and men of science, but we all know that the Simpsons already did it.

We emotionally carried ourselves with Lisa up the steps of Springfield house, like the flogged body of Jesus carrying the Cross uphill, Lo, when Lisa stood on the podium before the townspeople, she their Caesar, and pulled the switch – that mighty lever which plunged Springfield into dark abandon, and it was good – we were there in spirit with her, and it is here too that we remain back in front of our primordial dusts, asking, where o where are the constellations of yesteryear? Who will do the same and rend the world apiece?

Ha ha, I’m only kidding. No one gives a shit.

For more information on people who do, look up Neil DeGrasse’s lecture on “Space as Culture” – the only thing by Tyson I’d ever encourage anyone to watch – and then that puts into context the comment that this light pollution phenomenon constitutes a “cultural loss”.