Proving that there is a spark of good in 2016, Melbourne has just been issued with a flood alert.
To all of those at Rotunda who have fled to Melbourne, we say: enjoy your watery graves.
How will you find those Op Shops at the bottom of the sea?
We’re high and dry here in Perth, nerds.
Your participation in such a trial does not prove you in error as to your views, but your watery death below the forever drink will give evidence of a broader view: the accuracy of the Mayan calendar.
This has been a tense year with the rain gods, and we have been desperately killing our beloved idols to appease them.
And appeased they are!